In the last 100% Jodi episode I shared the first step to creating your goals for 2018: reflecting back on all you’ve accomplished this past year. In this episode I’m going to go over the whole process I use for setting worthy goals so if you’re celebrating Christmas today you may want to save this episode and come back to it in a day or two.
My background is in psychology and I’m one of those people who, after spending 6 years working on my undergraduate and graduate degree, realized I didn’t like where my studies were taking me and so opted for something else.
I was really discouraged and disappointed with where my life had gone and when I took an entry level corporate position I decided I was not going to stay there for long.
However, I thrived in that position and in the next 6 years I was promoted 5 times and it had everything to do with my mindset and my practice of setting goals.
I use this combination of mindset and action goals to help my clients achieve the results that they have been craving without having to work themselves into the ground. The tools and exercises I use with my clients help them to identify their own mindset and start zeroing in on the actions that are going to lead them to their ultimate goal.
Although we’re not getting into mindset here, there are plenty of episodes I’ve released that definitely help you with mindset, for this episode I’m diving into the exercise I’ve been using for the past several years for myself and on occasion with my clients to create goals.
This is not something to rush through so be sure you can dedicate a decent amount of time to give each question some thought.
Pull out a blank piece of paper or on your electronic device write down and answer the following questions based on the prior year:
1. What were my successes and opportunities (personal and professional)?
If you listened to the last 100% Jodi episode, Before You Choose Your Goals, Do This, you may already have done this.
Do not do this quickly. Really dig deep and look at every area of your life: health, finances, relationships, career, spirituality, personal development, etc. Ask others to help you with this one if you don’t have a good list going. We often dismiss our successes thinking they are no big deal. They are a big deal and they should be acknowledged.
2. What are the lessons I learned?
This may be easier to come up with if you are someone who tends to focus on or beat yourself up over mistakes. Think of the things that happened that prompted you to think, “I won’t be doing that again.”
3. What surprised me?
It's the unexpected that helps us to make our blind spots a little smaller. What results, outcomes, opportunities, or consequences did you not expect - good, bad or neutral?
4. Based on my Values and who I REALLY am, what do I want?
Don’t hold back, be honest about what you want to happen in the coming year. Don’t worry about how it’s going to happen.
You’ll use this section later to calibrate your answers to make sure your goals are worthy of you. These can't be things that incrementally build on the goals you've accomplished (or did not accomplish) last year. These goals must reflect your values and focus on creating, rather than changing, a situation or relationship in your life.
For instance, the goal would not be to lose 10 pounds. A goal that is worthy of you is to wake in the morning feeling refreshed and energized, comfortable in your own skin.
Part of attaining that goal may include changing your nutrition or getting more activity in your day but 10 pounds is arbitrary and does not guarantee you'll feel energized. To feel refreshed and energized in the morning will call on more than diet and exercise and will have a greater ripple effect than the scale moving or your clothing size changing.
5. What from the list of answers above informs me how I can recreate any area of my personal or professional life? (Circle or highlight the one’s that stand out)
Of the items you circled or highlighted pick four or five. These are your focus areas in 2018.
Define your overarching goal and set milestones
From here you will create a plan and milestones (or smaller goals) that will help you to achieve your overarching goals. You will also use these focus areas to weigh whether or not to let some things go or take advantage of a new opportunity.
6. Create your goals or metrics based on your focus areas.
For example, you’re focus area may be to increase your income or profitability margin. You’ll want to define what that means. It may be to make to make $5,000 more than last year. A metric may be to ask for a raise, start a side-business or improve your retention rate.
Another example, your focus area may be to run a Spartan race successfully. You’ll first want to define what “successfully” means to you. Based on that definition you’ll create metrics and milestones to help you get there. It may be how fast you can run 5 miles, being able to do pull-ups, etc.
With each goal create an action plan with milestones that will take you to your goal.
Plug in celebrations and rewards for hitting the milestones and get an accountability partner. Having another person who will witness your challenges and successes will motivate you to stay on track.
Make sure the goals you choose reflect your highest values and get you excited. The satisfaction you feel on achieving your goals is directly related to choosing the right goals for you, the ones that stretched you a bit, and how well you executed your plan.
A goal that is worthy of you calls you to express the best parts of you and motivates you to keep going, even when staying on track is tough. And upon reaching a goal that is worth of you, you will feel pure joy.
And if you want to set yourself up for a great new year by playing along with the Tolerations Detox Challenge register here womentakingthelead.com/tolerations.
As always, I hope this was of value to you and here’s to your success!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
Marie is a veteran of the Portland and Maine media markets, in sales, business development and management positions. She also produced and distributed television programs that received industry acclaim.
Most recently, Marie worked internationally for the Young Presidents’ Organization, the premier Chief Executive Leadership organization in the world - with over 20,000 members. As Director of Integration, she interfaced with business leaders around the world in a myriad of areas including, but not limited to, membership support, event and workshop planning, corporate communication, and creating the first, full-fledged new member integration program from the ground-up.
In this on-air coaching episode Marie needed some clarity around using live video to engage her audience. It was something she resisted and was surprised to find…she loves it! However, she wants to make sure she is doing it purposefully it helps her to forward Daughters of Change and doesn’t become another thing to do.
Although on the surface it appears like we are just talking about live video. However, as is common in the coaching I do, there is a lot more going on under the surface that is keeping Marie from releasing live videos to more than just her friends and family.
Thank you again, Marie, for sharing what you are struggling with right now. And for those of you listening, if you’re experiencing doubts in your business or your career, reach out! This is what I do. I was email corresponding with Nicole Boucher yesterday, who was on the last On-Air Coaching episode and she reported that things have been wonderful over the past few weeks and to quote her, “I feel that I have such a sense of purpose and clarity. I need to blog about my word of the year ("Nourish") and your help in getting me to that place.
Nicole, I cannot wait for you to post that blog. I’m going to blast it everywhere.
Again, if you feel like you’re spinning your wheels because it’s not clear what direction you should take or how to go about making things happen, reach out to me. Email me at jodi @ womentakingthelead.com or message me through any platform. I’m always happy to hear from you!
Web: http://www.daughtersofchange.com
Email: msola@daughtersofchange.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/daughtersofchange
Women Taking the Lead Interview: https://womentakingthelead.com/marie-sola/
Zola Registry: Zola is an all-in-one wedding registry that will do anything for love. Register for the things that you need and want, as well as experiences, cash funds, and honeymoon funds – all in one place! Choose products from their beautifully curated assortment in the Zola store, and ask for contributions towards your honeymoon…or anything at all! To sign up and get a $50 credit towards your registry, click here.
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
I hope that as you’re listening to this episode you are in a good place physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. I hope you are enjoying the season and surrounded with love. This time of year there is greater emphasis on having gratitude for what we have and to be kind to those around us.
I’m going to encourage you to especially be kind to yourself. I know you all are working so hard to hit your goals, to take care of your families and to honor your responsibilities. Just remember, you at your best can get all that done more quickly and easily than the version of you that is over-tired, feeling frazzled or unappreciated; or the you that is fighting off an illness.
Those around you are happy when you’re happy so give them what they want.
I also have some exciting news for the New Year. Year after year I, and many of you, experience the post-holidays fatigue. I’ve gotten the low-down from many of you. You’re so wiped from all the activity that you limp into the New Year and don’t hit your groove until late January or even February.
Let’s change that this year. Starting on January 1st I’m going to help you get re-energized within days. I’ve done this work with my clients and it is remarkable how quickly this can help you go from feeling tired and burdened to light, energized and ready for action!
This is a Tolerations Detox. What happens is that over time in our busy lives we begin to tolerate things because we tell ourselves that we don’t have the time or energy to deal with them head on. So we ignore them, put up with them; we try to let go, move on, accept or make peace with these things but consciously or subconsciously they are still bothering us so we have to use some of our energy to try to keep them off our radar.
And when I say we have to use some of energy I mean we have to use some of our energy for each little thing we are tolerating, and the bigger the toleration the more energy it takes. And for some of us we are tolerating so many things we are expending a great deal of energy to keep from getting bogged down by them, to keep up appearance of “everything’s fine” and to stay on top of the important things that need our attention.
As our overall energy becomes depleted we start to feel busier and so we feel like we have even less time and less energy to deal with the things that bother us. These tolerations start to build like plaque and clog up our energy system.
To explain away our lack of energy and lack of ability to focus and engage, we say things like “It’s because I’m getting older” or “I’ve just been so busy” or “the weather is bringing me down” or, “I think I have adult ADD.”
At the end of the day you’re probably baffled by how tired you are and wonder how other people get the energy to get in a workout, go out with friends, or work on a hobby or project after dinner. While you are sitting on the couch watching TV because it’s the time you can check out and unplug from the day.
What I’m going to tell you, and I want you to sit with this, is you have as much energy as all those people. You could also be waking up in the morning jumping out of bed, rocking your day and spending your evenings doing whatever you like, whatever you find fulfilling.
What I have for you that will help you get back your energy is a Tolerations Detox Challenge.
This Challenge will kick off on January 1st and every other day for 10 days I’m going to guide you through identifying all the little and big things you are tolerating in your life, your home, your finances, your relationships, your work and even your car or mode of transportation; not all at once, we’re going to do this little by little and I’m going to share with you how to remove the tolerations in a way that feels good to you. I’m not going to ask you to do anything that you’re not ready to do.
You’ll do this process at your pace. You’ll have a couple of days in between each challenge to remove a couple of tolerations (or more if you’re so motivated). Let me tell you, once you do a few you’re going to feel a difference and it’s going to feel great.
If you are interested in playing along with this challenge go to womentakingthelead.com/tolerations to register. Let’s kick off the New Year with a bang and with an abundance of good energy. Go to womentakingthelead.com/tolerations to sign up for the Tolerations Detox Challenge.
Last week I promised to take you through a goal-setting process I use for myself and my clients. Today, we’re going to take the first step.
Years ago, my coach and I were talking about my goals for the coming year. Before I got into the list I had created she asked if I had captured all my accomplishments from the previous year.
It gave me pause and at first I resisted the notion.
All I could think was, "great, another task." It reminded me of preparing for my own performance reviews in the past and that thought brought me no pleasure. It felt like I had to prove I had been productive and valuable in the past year. That was a turn off.
Then she explained the reason she was asking. She said, "Often times I find I've accomplished way more than I would have given myself credit for at first glance. It's so easy to forget the small victories you've had along the way when you're focused on all the obstacles that still need to be faced to achieve the big goal."
She was right. When I started to create the list I started with the obvious. That year I had survived my second corporate acquisition with my sanity intact, for the most part. I became certified as a professional coach, started my business, took my first paying clients and performed a comedy skit in front of 150 people and received a standing ovation.
Then I started remembering the less obvious accomplishments. There was a relationship with one of my sisters that had previously been on life support was transformed that year, I developed amazing connections with fellow coaches and business owners, I changed my coaching niche...etc.
It had the desired effect. I was awed at what an amazing year I had, amazed at who I became in the process and grateful for all that I had faced.
Reflecting on and writing down your achievements is like a booster shot in the arm.
Giving yourself the credit you deserve increases your confidence, quiets the critical voice in your head and energizes you to go after bigger goals.
The first step to creating your goals for next year is to start with what you've achieved this past year. What worked for you? What went well? Even if it was unexpected, write it down!
We are all capable of more than we give ourselves credit for. Celebrating and remembering all our victories great and small will get us that much closer to reaching our full potential.
Do yourself a favor, take the time to sit still and reflect on the most important thing in your life: you.
And if you want to set yourself up for a great new year by playing along with the Tolerations Detox Challenge go to womentakingthelead.com/tolerations to register. Again, that’s womentakingthelead.com/tolerations.
As always, I hope this was of value to you and here’s to your success!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
We are now in December and it is getting chilly here in Maine but I’m getting excited for Christmas. What’s been fun has been chatting with those of you in the Facebook group who are in the southern hemisphere. As I’m posting about the cooling temperatures you are getting ready for some hot days. I love that this podcast has allowed me to connect with so many amazing people all over the globe. I feel blessed and I’m looking forward to meeting more of you in the year to come.
Speaking of the year to come I have an episode coming next week that will start you thinking about goals. Tis the season for goal setting but I’m not a believer in jumping right in and setting arbitrary goals. I have a process I am going to take you through over a couple of episodes that will make sure the goals you set will inspire you and be worthy of you.
In the meantime, I want to talk to you about the assessment tool I use in my business because I don’t think I’ve given it its proper due up until this point.
I am licensed to administer the Energy Leadership Index Assessment. This is a one-of-a-kind attitudinal assessment that acts as a mirror to reveal your perceptions, attitudes, behaviors and overall leadership capabilities – as they currently are. Because attitude is subjective it can be altered and get you the results your looking for. But the first step is awareness and the Energy Leadership Assessment provides that.
This assessment is administered online – so you can do it when it is convenient for you – and it takes about 20 minutes to complete. You’ll then have access to my calendar to schedule a 75-minute debrief of your results. You get a report that breaks out 7 levels of awareness and we are going to go through each one and identify what perceptions, attitudes and behaviors are holding you back and what ones are working for you that you can lean into.
I have administered this assessment to over 100 people and the common reactions are amazement, relief that there are simple solutions to common problems and a feeling that the future holds a lot more opportunity than what was previously perceived.
Although I commonly use the assessment as a beginning to a coaching package or a lead in to a strategy session it can be a stand-alone opportunity to identify some hidden areas of opportunity that you have overlooked.
I can’t stress enough this assessment and debrief is powerful and well worth the money. If you are ready to do this next year differently, with better results and less stress, contact me at Jodi at Women Taking the Lead dot com.
Next on the agenda that I wanted to let you know is there is going to be a frequency change to the podcast. I am now going to be releasing one episode per week. This is coming about for a couple of reasons. Taking on doing a 100% Jodi episode each week has been awesome and taxing. I don’t want the quality of these episodes to slip so I’m going to weave in some natural breaks.
Also, I’ve been getting feedback from all of you about the episodes that are hitting home for you and providing the most value. Everyone agrees the interviews are good and there’s always a nugget of wisdom, if not more, to walk away with. You are loving the 100% Jodi episodes, thank you, and the On-Air Coaching episodes are blowing your mind. Awesome!
Taking all that in and the new frequency of one episode per week, here’s what it’s going to look like. I will release one interview episode per month, one On-Air Coaching episode per month and the other weeks will be 100% Jodi episodes.
I think this will give the right mix of content that you are looking for and that I can provide.
Now, to do one On-Air Coaching episode per month I am going to need volunteers from the community. What I am asking is that those who volunteer either have read my book, taken the assessment or done private coaching with me. This will ensure that the content of the coaching episode stay focused on the intent of the podcast: to help you overcome self-doubt so you lead with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you meet this criteria reach out to me. I am scheduling virtual coffee chats with volunteers so we can meet, talk about what the experience will be like and answer any questions. Email me at Jodi at Women Taking the Lead dot com.
Wow, there have been many changes made since launching Women Taking the Lead over 2 ½ years ago. I can’t think of a change that was initiated by the feedback in this community that didn’t result in a better quality podcast. Continue to give me your feedback and I promise to continue to do my best to make the changes that will provide everyone what they need.
I found this quote by Pearl Zhu. “Change shouldn’t be treated as a singular occurrence when it is an ongoing, continued process and dynamic capability within the organization.” I believe that! Rather than seeing change as a bad thing we can see thought out changes as opportunities for growth, experimenting, finding efficiencies and getting better results.
Having said that, I’ve got one more thought for the Energy Leadership Index Assessment. If there are some changes you know you need to make but you’ve been hesitating or resisting them this assessment could be the catalyst that will make those changes much easier. Get this done before the New Year and I guarantee your 2018 will be much more fulfilling than your 2017.
I hope this was of value to you and here’s to your success!!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
Suzanne Anderson is a change agent for women change makers. As a psychologist, author, executive coach, speaker and transformational facilitator she has dedicated the past 15 years of her career in leadership development to decoding an embodied, integral and accelerated pathway to awaken consciousness and leadership capacity in women. In her global online programs and retreats she guides women to do the deep work of upgrading their inner operating systems and becoming a match for these complex times. She is the coauthor of the award-winning book The Way of the Mysterial Woman: Upgrading How you Live, Love and Lead.
Click to tweet: @MysterialWoman is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://womentakingthelead.com/244 #inspiration
At the end of 2012, Suzanne was preparing for a huge launch for the new year. It was time to take what she knew and bring it out into the world. A few days into January, Suzanne’s world came crashing down as she came home to find her husband dead. Within 6 months, her life had drastically contracted, when she had expected expansion, and everything she considered the most dear was gone. Through it all, Suzanne’s center held, even though she had never felt so uncertain.
Suzanne’s leadership is Mysterial. She brings together the feminine and masculine principles and embraces the capacity to unfold the emergent.
Suzanne is excited about her transition into the online world. When the online world wasn’t as present, Suzanne had a vision of 144,000 Mysterial Women. At the time she didn’t know how she would achieve those numbers, as most of her work in the past was based around retreats. Now with the worldwide online community, Suzanna can see her vision coming to life.
Though Suzanne is excited about the online world, she finds it challenging to get her name out there in order to reach those 144,000 women.
Suzanne starts each day with what she calls her Morning Flow. “How we enter into the day has everything to do with what actually unfolds in the day.”
“I know it doesn’t feel like you belong, but your time is coming. Keep following the thread of your destiny. You were born for these times and we are getting you ready for what you need to do.”
“The place life calls you to, where the most aliveness is, is where your deep gladness and the world’s deep hunger meet.” ~Frederick Buechner
Website: mysterialwoman.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Suzanne.Anderson.MysterialWoman/
Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/mysterialwoman/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mysterialwoman/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MysterialWoman
ThirdLove: Tired of compromising comfort, ThirdLove® set out to create a better bra. Armed with research and a lot of opinions, they scrapped the standard bra cup size molds—literally broke them!—and developed their own half-cup sizes based on real women’s measurements. Check out ThirdLove today!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
Nicole Boucher is a Project Manager who helps small business owners be more productive and strategic with their time so they can grow their businesses with less overwhelm. She loves the business side of business—strategy, spreadsheets, and systems—and her clients love feeling the weight lifting off their shoulders with the support of a true brand partner.
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
Elizabeth Ross Holmstrom is the Founder and President of BreakTogether. Elizabeth founded BreakTogether to improve health and work in office/tech environments. With twenty years of health and wellness design experience, most recently as VP with a national bank and 26,000 employees, she’s witnessed the power of mindfulness. We’ve spent decades creating new ways to connect 24/7, leading to significant increases in stress-related illnesses. Her proven methods help people work better in 2-10 minutes a day, unplugged. When she isn’t practicing, she may be mountain biking on the nearest wooded trail and singing along the way.
Click to tweet: .@BreakTogetherME is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://womentakingthelead.com/243 #inspiration
Several years ago, Elizabeth was given the opportunity to manage a new program that lead 70 different work groups. On one of their monthly calls, someone on the client team berated members of her team over something insignificant and Elizabeth had to change conversation topics. After the group call was over, she took a walk to calm down before meeting with this person one-on-one. During their call, Elizabeth stood up for herself, despite her fears, and ended up forming a very good working relationship with that person.
Elizabeth searches for strengths in others. She feels it is always best to work on the things you are good at, and collaborate with others on the things you aren’t good at.
Elizabeth is thrilled about her new website updates. Now that she has a clearer product and a clearer path to describe, she is excited her website will reflect that.
Elizabeth struggles prioritizing her to-do list. She needs to focus on important tasks and not get sucked into other things when she logs on.
Elizabeth is compassionate and always strives to listen and understand where people are coming from so she can better serve them.
“Trust your intuitions.”
“There’s no such thing as a weird human being, its just that some people might require more understanding than others.” ~Tom Robbins
Website: http://www.breaktogether.net
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/elizabethrossholmstrom/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/BreakTogetherME
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/BreakTogether/
Email: Elizabeth@breaktogether.net
Office: 207-370-9055
Zola Registry: Zola is an all-in-one wedding registry that will do anything for love. Register for the things that you need and want, as well as experiences, cash funds, and honeymoon funds – all in one place! Choose products from their beautifully curated assortment in the Zola store, and ask for contributions towards your honeymoon…or anything at all! To sign up and get a $50 credit towards your registry, click here.
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
As of the date this episode was released it is Thanksgiving Day here in the US. It is always a good time to be thankful for all the blessings in our lives. It’s too easy to focus on what’s missing and what’s not going right and that creates a very unpleasant experience. Taking the time to reflect on what we have and what’s going right creates a peaceful and grateful state of mind that can help us to stay calm and in action. If you have not yet added a gratitude practice in your daily routing I’m going to highly recommend it.
One thing I am incredibly grateful for this week is all the changes that have been happening to my website. More changes are going to roll out over time but for now womentakingthelead.com definitely has a new look and feel to it. I would love for you to check it out and let me know what you think. Many of the best ideas for my business including the website, this podcast, and the services I provide have come from my clients and community. Sometimes we’re too close to something to see the obvious so I am grateful for any feedback I can get; positive, negative or neutral.
This episode is the fourth and last episode in a series based on one of the most impactful books I have ever read, The Four Agreements, and an event that I attended in Portland, Maine. The speakers at the event I attended were don Miguel Ruiz Sr., who is the author of The Four Agreements, and his sons don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. and don Jose Ruiz.
In this series I’m sharing with you the notes I took that evening and some of my thoughts around the material. The agreements I’ve covered in the first three episodes where Be Impeccable with Your Word, Always Do Your Best and Don’t Take Anything Personally. I’ve introduced each agreement in the order in which they were presented at the event.
There was one agreement left as don Jose Ruiz came to the stage, Don’t Make Assumptions. And again a twist on how to apply this agreement to your life was presented.
From the book The Four Agreements the guidance for Don’t Make Assumptions reads, “Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.”
When I read The Four Agreements 20 years ago I read this agreement as relating mostly to not making assumptions about other people. However, don Jose Ruiz focused mostly on not making assumptions about yourself. I went back to the book to see if this was a completely new twist and discovered it was not.
Be open to avoid making assumptions. Open your heart.
Remember who you are. You are a temple of love.
You can overcome anything, including yourself.
You are here to love unconditionally and that includes yourself.
If you are not happy with yourself how can you be happy with another?
You are the love of your own life. Love yourself so you can love another.
Be skeptical of the negativity you direct at yourself: that you are not perfect, that you are not enough and that you cannot change.
Respect and love yourself. What do you love about your temple?
We assume people see things the way we do and so when they do not say and do what we think they should be saying and doing we assume it’s for a negative reason.
This is why we struggle with being ourselves. We are such a harsh critic of ourselves we assume if others knew “the real” us they would judge us as harshly as we judge ourselves. In this way we project our view of the world onto other, thus completely misunderstanding the other person and internally or externally attacking the other person for intentions they do not have.
To stop this vicious cycle we have to (one) change the way we treat ourselves. Again, you are the love of your own life. Love yourself so you can love others. And (two) ask other people what their view is, what their intentions are.
We are wired to need to understand, to have the answer to questions that float through our mind. If we do not seek the truth we will make stuff up to have any answer even if it is incorrect. This causes so much suffering.
That is why with the one agreement to Don’t Make Assumptions you can completely transform your life.
Can you imagine how this one agreement could change who you are as a leader and as a business owner?
By not making assumptions you are less like to take things personally and be hurt by others words or actions. Making assumptions is the breeding ground for taking things personally. It’s a one-two punch.
Take some time today to imagine what life would be like if you were no longer emotionally derailed by other people; if, rather than need to expend energy on managing your emotions, you could calmly and directly ask questions to get the heart of the situation.
How much more could you accomplish in a day, a week or a year? It will blow your mind if you take some time to think about it.
And if this is something you struggle with reach out to me. This is part of the work I do with my clients. With the process I take them through they get so much energy back that they in turn use to hit their goals and create even better ones. Don’t go it alone if you don’t have to.
CTA: Before I wrap this up I want to invite you to go to womentakingthelead.com take a look around at the site and give me your feedback you can reach me at Jodi at womentakingthelead.com or message me on any social media platform. I am eager to hear what you think and I don’t take anything personally; it’s all valuable information to me.
As always, I hope this was of value to you and here’s to your success!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
You might mistake my guest today for Superwoman and if you do, you won't be alone. But Alissa believes YOU have Superpowers too! Alissa Daire Nelson is regularly featured on television news segments, inside major blogs and publications, and on podcasts from all over the globe. She's an accomplished Success Coach, Speaker, host of the Maximize Your Strengths podcast, as well as published Author of the hot new book; From Frustrated to Frickin' Awesome: 4 Steps to Achieve the Success You're Wired For. But more than anything else she's an exceedingly proud wife and mother of two, who loves helping others discover how to make their businesses and relationships thrive in harmony.
Click to tweet: .@daire2succeed is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://womentakingthelead.com/242 #inspiration
Alissa was working as a dietician, and going after her second degree, while drowning in unhappiness. She believed if she kept doing more, she would achieve more, which would lead to happiness. Alissa started drinking and one night found herself behind the wheel, intoxicated. That moment was Alissa’s lowest point. She was living someone else’s life, doing what she thought she should have been doing. Now, Alissa is cautious about her “shoulds” and focuses more on the things she has accomplished.
Alissa is a visionary. She can help paint the bigger picture and look beyond the next step so her clients can find hope. Though she creates the plan, she looks to those around her for accountability and support to get the stuff done.
Alissa is working on a brand new podcast and membership site that she is thrilled about. Her new podcast, The Freaking Awesome Entrepreneur, will go beyond her current podcast, Maximize Your Strengths, and incorporate more of herself into the show.
Alissa struggles to manage all of the details for her current projects without letting things fall between the cracks.
Alissa trusts in people that are better at things than she is.
“You are enough exactly how you are.”
“Life doesn’t happen to you, it happens for you.”
Website: http://daire2succeed.com/
Freebie: http://daire2succeed.com/takingthelead
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/DaireSuccessCoaching/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/daire2succeed
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dairesuccesscoaching
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
Anne L’Heureux is a Spartan SGX Coach and Registered Dietitian Nutritionist. Anne works with clients on and off the race course to perform at their best and nourish the body. Anne believes that the lessons learned in obstacle racing can be applied to everyday life to overcome physical, mental, and emotional challenges. Through fitness and nutrition, Anne believes our true Beast is hiding inside, waiting to be unleashed.
Anne has been featured in Maine Women’s Magazine, FitMaine.com, and has been recognized as Today’s Dietitian Magazine’s “Dietitian of the Week”.
She was a 2016 Spartan Elite Points Series Leader and the 2017 Killington Beast winner. Anne coaches OCR Athletes dedicated to fueling for performance as well as taking care of the one body that we get. She believes that overcoming challenges in life starts by placing focus on a strong body and mind.
Click to tweet: .@AnneLHeureux3 is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://womentakingthelead.com/241 #inspiration
Anne was very shy her whole life, up until her sixth week of bootcamp. Joining the Navy and going to bootcamp is tough, but going in shy and without a friend, was even tougher. Until one day a switch when off and she just started doing it. “You don’t have to do it well, you just have to do it.”
Anne had been trying to lead people to proper nutrition by supplying them with a plethora of information, but people can find information on their own. She had to change her ways and work on empowering them to want to make a difference.
Anne is currently developing a platform to reach more people. In order to be successful, you have to bring value and build a community. Anne wants to be able to reach more people and bring value, without making people pay too much.
Anne’s biggest challenge as business expands and picks up is making sure she is bringing value but also understanding the value that she brings. She doesn’t want money to be an obstacle, but at the same time when you’re running a business, it’s about money.
You have to live it. Through living it, Anne knows how to approach the person.
“Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Nothing happens in your comfort zone.”
“Do and believe that which leads you to your goals.” ~Tom Bilyeu
New website! https://www.fueltrainovercome.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/anne_lheureuxocrsgx/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SPartanSGXBFD/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/AnneLHeureux3
ThirdLove: Tired of compromising comfort, ThirdLove® set out to create a better bra. Armed with research and a lot of opinions, they scrapped the standard bra cup size molds—literally broke them!—and developed their own half-cup sizes based on real women’s measurements. Check out ThirdLove today!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
There has been some excitement around here but of a different flavor than last week. I recorded last week’s episode on Sunday, October 29th and there was a rain and wind storm hit the coast of Maine that evening. On Monday morning at 5:15 my power went out.
Luckily Monday the 30th was a relatively mild day for this time of year being about 60 degrees. But as I checked in with the website that was tracking the number of households without power the number kept rising throughout the day. Soon the website would show about 400,000 households without power. This was not going to be a quick recovery.
I was also fortunate to have a friend text me that afternoon asking if I had power and to come stay at her house until the power came back. I do not like to be cold and the idea of sleeping in my place which probably would have dropped down into the 40s and 50s over the next several days did not appeal to me.
While my home did not have power until late Wednesday evening I was blessed to be staying somewhere with heat, electricity and Wi-Fi. There was some low-grade stress due to the uncertainty of the situation and being out of my normal routine but it was nothing and I got to spend more quality time with my friend and her team as they set up a satellite office around her kitchen table.
I shared in my newsletter a perspective that helped me to focus on the benefits of the situation rather than the inconveniences. Rather than wallowing in how much I did not want to be without power, which represents the perspective of “Why is this happening to me?” I wondered instead, “Why is this happening for me?”
Beginning to wonder from that perspective I was able to see some benefits of having the power go out that I had not been able to see before.
I wonder how often we fail to see the benefits of things not going according to plan. I’ll be pondering this more because things rarely go according to plan.
On a lighter note, this week marks the first anniversary of the publishing of my book Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing. It went live in Amazon on November 8, 2016. The Kindle version alone got over 1600 downloads that first week making it an Amazon Bestseller. It also hit #1 in four different categories: Business Life, Motivational Business Management, Business Motivation and Self-Improvement, and Personal Transformation.
To celebrate this occasion I have reduced the price of the Kindle version from $7.95 to .99 cents for one week. If you are hearing this episode in real time, and you don’t have your Kindle version of Accomplished yet you can grab it for .99 cents until November 14, 2017.
Thank you to those who have already read Accomplished and thank you to those of you who are going to get it now. I just received and email from someone a few days ago who said they read it in a day. It’s an easy read and if it speaks to you, you’re probably going to have a hard time putting it down.
In the last two 100% Jodi episodes I began a series based on one of the most impactful books I have ever read, The Four Agreements. The agreements covered in the first two episodes where Be Impeccable with Your Word and Always Do Your Best.
When people ask what book I would recommend to others The Four Agreements is the book I recommend most. The reason for this is I believe the biggest thing holding us back in our lives and in our businesses is our stress reactions. Our stress reactions are created by our perception of self, others and the world at large.
Quite simply, the teachings in The Four Agreements enable you to change your perception so you don’t get stressed out by what’s happening. Because you don’t get stressed out and thus shut down, overreact or pretend things are okay when they are not, you can bring forth your highest self in any situation.
The Four Agreements are powerful because they are simple. I recently had the pleasure of attending an event in Portland, Maine titled The Four Agreements for a Better Life. The speakers were don Miguel Ruiz Sr., who is the author of The Four Agreements, and his sons don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. and don Jose Ruiz.
In this series I’m sharing with you the notes I took that evening and some of my thoughts around the material.
This is part three in this series. In part one, I shared don Miguel Ruiz, Sr.’s perspective on the agreement, Be Impeccable with Your Word and in part two don Miguel Ruiz Jr.’s perspective on Always Do Your Best.
That evening Don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. continued his presentation to quickly talk about another agreement, Don’t Take Anything Personally.
From the book The Four Agreements the overview for Don’t Take Anything Personally reads, “Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.”
And these are the notes taken from the talk that evening:
Don’t assume responsibility for other’s actions.
Taking things personally is another form of conditional love.
When people are mean to you they are asking for your help.
Don Miguel, Jr. told a story of travelling with his father for some speaking engagements. On one particular evening they did their event and arrived back at their hotel and looked around for a place to eat.
Don Miguel Jr. shared that when he looked into the lounge and the restaurant area he noticed everyone in there was impeccably dressed and he didn’t want to go in there until he had a chance to get more dressed up. So he suggested to his father they freshen up and meet back in the lobby. His father agreed and they went to their own rooms to change.
Don Miguel, Jr., all dressed up, came back down to the lobby to wait for his father. When the elevator doors opened Don Miguel Sr. comes out wearing his pajamas, a bathrobe and slippers. Don Miguel Jr. was mortified but tried to play it cool as they went into the restaurant, passed all the people dressed to the nines, and were seated. His father seeing his discomfort asked him what was wrong. Don Miguel Jr. denied any discomfort until finally he blurted out his mortification that his father would come down to the restaurant dressed as he was.
Don Miguel Sr. replied, “Do you disrespect me so much that you don’t think I can pay the consequences of my own actions; that you think you have to pay them for me.”
In that moment Don Miguel Jr. realized what his father was doing had nothing to do with him personally and yet he was taking it on as if it was.
How many times do we cringe or feel disappointed because a family member or close friend, or anyone, is behaving in a way that we would not choose to behave. And even though it has nothing to do with us we feel embarrassed or guilty on their behalf. We may even go so far as to apologize on their behalf as if we have the right to do so.
His last message was that if you have ever done this forgive yourself for ever saying yes to conditional love.
That’s the end of my notes on this agreement from that evening though I’ve had time to ponder this agreement since then. First I want to acknowledge that these agreements are simple but they are not easy. Without training and diligence we can easily slip into the old automatic ways of thinking and responding. We are ego-centric beings and we have a hard time separating what someone else does from ourselves.
I’ve had my own experiences within the last 24 hours in which more than one person failed to do what I had requested and I took it personally. I made it mean they didn’t appreciate or respect me; then I didn’t, then I did again, then I let go again, and later I remembered I was still waiting for what I requested and I got annoyed again. That’s what it can look like and I’m hoping your chuckling about this because we all do it.
Reminders are important when we are taking on new perspectives and ways of being and responding. Until it becomes a habit, plant a sticky note on your mirror or monitor, or as a backdrop on your computer to remind you that what other people do has nothing to do with you; it only has anything to do with them.
This reminder, especially in the past 24 hours has helped me to have compassion for the people I’ve been thinking of. I remind myself I have no idea what’s going on for them in their world. With that thought I can stay calm and a little detached from what’s happening and check in with them without any hard feelings.
I’m going to encourage you to take this on at least for today and see what happens. Set up reminders so you don’t forget. Your mission is don’t take anything personally. What others say and do has nothing to do with you.
I’m just asking you to commit for one day to see how it goes. If you are so moved reach out to me and let me know how it went.
Just a reminder, until November 14, 2017 you can get the Kindle version of Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing for .99 cents on Amazon.com. If you type accomplished or Jodi Flynn in the Amazon search bar the book will be at or near the top of the list.
As always, I hope this and everything I’m sharing is of value to you and here’s to your success!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
As a tech translator, Lynette Delane embodies an intrinsic ability to save business owners time, and therefore money. It’s like her magic trick. Her purpose is to deliver back to her clients the all-elusive “spare” time so they can use it to do what they love. She puts her principles into practice in her own business – Kits and Bits – founded with the desire to create a work/life balance and prove to her clients it can be done!
Click to tweet: .@kitsandbitsoz is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://
Being the youngest of 9, Lynette constantly worried about what other people thought. Formal qualifications became a hurdle for Lynette. She watched her friends get their degrees and she started to doubt her own abilities because she lacked that piece of paper. Her biggest strength wasn’t that piece of paper, though, it was her ability to do things differently and learn as she went along.
Lynette leads by example and would never ask someone to do something she hasn’t done herself.
Lynette trains businesses in software in ways that will be most beneficial for their company. Her newest program focuses on Microsoft Office, and teaching people the exact skills they need to be more efficient.
Lynette struggles with visibility, alongside the fact that most people believe they know everything there is to know about Microsoft Office. In reality, Microsoft Office isn’t usually utilized to its full potential. So, getting people to see her and understand how much they really do need her is something that challenges Lynette.
Understanding the process is key to Lynette being a better leader. Lynette also believes that having empathy for the effects of her trainings, especially in tech, is absolutely necessary.
“You do not need that paper, just get on with it!”
“Let go of who you think you’re supposed to be and embrace who you are.” ~Brene Brown
Website: http://kitsandbits.
Facebook: http://bit.ly/
Youtube: http://bit.ly/
Google+: http://bit.ly/
Twitter: http://bit.ly/
https://twitter.com/
LinkedIn: http://bit.ly/
Instagram: http://bit.ly/
Pinterest: http://bit.ly/
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
There are some exciting things going on behind the scenes here. I mentioned the upcoming changes to my website in last week’s 100% Jodi. There are other changes I’m planning for this podcast, The Accomplished Membership Community and in the coaching services I provide. Some of the changes are subtle, some not so subtle and I will let you all know when the changes are real and you can actually look at them or experience them.
Suffice to say for now, the experience I’m having working with a digital strategist, the feedback I’m getting from all of you, and the experience I’m having doing A Course in Miracles, and the complimentary books I’m reading, are leading me in some exciting new directions.
I want to read to you an excerpt from one of those complimentary books I’m reading, The Law of Divine Compensation by Marianne Williamson.
“Your energy, your attitude, your positivity, your words, your ability to listen to others and truly dwell in the present; all those things make you a person others want to be with, want to work with, want to share ideas with. That energy is the spiritual basis for wealth creation.”What Marianne is talking about is self-leadership and this is the core of the business and leadership coaching I do. In fact, the starting point in working with me is taking the Energy Leadership Assessment.
The Energy Leadership Assessment captures your energy, your attitude, your positivity, your ability to listen to others and truly dwell in the present. It’s not a critique; it’s a snap shot to give you an idea of where you are starting from and where you can go.
And you’re not left there. In the debriefing of your results I am giving you practices and perspectives that will help you to increase your energy, positivity and abilities so you can be without a doubt the person others want to follow, want to work with, want to collaborate with, etc.
If you are interested in taking the Energy Leadership Assessment go to womentakingthelead.com/assessment to find out more and purchase your assessment so you can start getting the results you want to see.
In last week's 100% Jodi episode I introduced doing a series of episodes based on one of the most impactful books I have ever read, The Four Agreements.
Last May I published a 100% Jodi episode titled, 9 Places I Found What I (Didn't Realize) I Needed. In that episode I shared 9 books that came into my life and changed it for the better.
When people ask what book I would recommend to others The Four Agreements is the book I recommend most. The reason for this is I believe the biggest thing holding us back in our lives and in our businesses is our stress reactions. Our stress reactions are created by our perception of self, others and the world at large.
Quite simply, the teachings in The Four Agreements enable you to change your perception so you don’t get stressed out by what’s happening. Because you don’t get stressed out and thus shut down, overreact or pretend things are okay when they are not, you can bring forth your highest self in any situation.
The Four Agreements are powerful because they are simple. I recently had the pleasure of attending an event in Portland, Maine titled The Four Agreements for a Better Life. The speakers were don Miguel Ruiz, who is the author of The Four Agreements, and his sons don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. and don Jose Ruiz.
In this series I’m sharing with you the notes I took that evening and some of my thoughts around the material.
This is part two in this series. Last week I covered the opening of the evening in which don Miguel Ruiz, Sr. declared the most important agreement is Be Impeccable with Your Word.
I’ve been hearing from some of you that this talk provided a spin on this agreement that you had not considered before so if you personally did not catch that episode be sure to go back and give it a listen.
Next to the stage that evening was don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. and he covered the agreement, Always Do Your Best. Here are my notes as I wrote them.
Always do your best is the expression of unconditional love. It is living your life fully. Love yourself, love your body, and love your mind. Take care of yourself for your fullest expression of love.
Conditional love is the enemy of freedom. In fact, as don Miguel Jr. explained it, conditional love is the weapon used for domestication, or controlling the will of another human being.
Control of another is a form of disrespect that begins with creating self-doubt in another. Self-doubt then allows the perpetrator to exert their will and subjugate the other.
There are rewards and punishments in the process of domestication. The rewards feel like acceptance, feel like love and the punishment feels like rejection, a lack of love.
Looking at yourself in the mirror and judging yourself is the ultimate form of Domestication.
Couples also try to domesticate each other to fit their own image of love.
Taking the four agreements and making each one a means by which to judge yourself and others is domestication. Judgment takes a pure teaching or wisdom and corrupts it.
In a moment of clarity when we see what we have done we can make a choice to change for ourselves.
To unlearn our domestication we need bring awareness to our automatic ways of being, our automatic “yeses” and “nos.”
Being skeptical introduces reason and prevents the automatic “yes’ or “no.”
Putting your beliefs up for scrutiny (skepticism) will allow you to make a new choice.
What has someone else said that has stuck with you?
Chances are they said it once or a few time but you have been repeating it to yourself ever since, thus being complicit in your own domestication.
As Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
Forgive yourself for being complicit in your own domestication.
Be skeptical of negativity. Be skeptical of your own negativity.
That’s the end of my notes and I have to share when don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. introduced skepticism…let’s just say I was a little surprised. I was skeptical of being skeptical which is making me laugh a little bit now.
However, what I’ve come to realize is doses of skepticism allow you to bring more awareness to the forefront. Rather than knee-jerk reacting into a verbal response or a behavior we can take a step back and consider the options.
I’ve come to realize there are very few things that need to be rushed. Yet, we often rush to try to fit more into our lives only to realize most of the things we’re rushing to fit in are things we don’t want or need in the first place.
In fact, rushing will cause us to overlook important details that we will have to take the time to fix or make amends for later.
Always do your best is the expression of unconditional love. It is living your life fully. Love yourself, love your body, and love your mind. Take care of yourself for your fullest expression of love.
I’m bringing this back around to the Energy Leadership Assessment because it goes hand-in-hand with don Miguel Jr.’s coverage of “always do your best”. His coverage had at its core bringing awareness to your automatic ways of being. That is exactly what the Energy Leadership Assessment does. It allows you to see what your knee-jerk reactions to stress are so you choose a different response if you want to and get a different result.
It’s a quick and dirty way to get at the heart of what has been keeping you from accomplishing the goals you long for.
If you are interested in taking the Energy Leadership Assessment go to womentakingthelead.com/assessment to find out more and purchase your assessment so you can start getting the results you want to see.
As always, I hope this was of value to you and here’s to your success!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
Giovanna passionately advocates for women to stop settling for less in all areas of their lives! She began her spiritual and personal development journey over 20 years ago and now acts as a catalyst for the transformation of the mind and the belief systems that hold you back and sabotage your life, relationships and businesses. She calls her approach a form of Radical Self Love & Responsibility; which brings forward more energy, presence, authenticity and visibility in the people she works with.
Click to tweet: .@sherisespodcast is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://womentakingthelead.com/239 #inspiration
Giovanna found herself overwhelmed with grief in her hotel room in Mexico after awaking from a nightmare. A recent breakup, paired with the death of her mother, had Giovanna in despair, imagining herself dying of a broken heart. A peace came over Giovanna when she put her arms around herself and realized what she had to do to save herself.
Giovanna leads by example. The reason she is a coach is so that she can share her life experiences and what she has learned.
Giovanna is currently writing a book, and it is making her giddy every time she sits down to write it.
As visible as Giovanna is, she feels she needs to up it a notch. She wants to get out in front of more audiences and share her story to more people.
Giovanna calls in something greater to work through her when she is working with clients. If she pretends to have all the answers, it doesn’t often work out the way it should.
“Find love inside yourself.”
“You’re not doing this alone.”
Website: www.sherisespodcast.com
Instagram @she_rises_podcast
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/sherisespodcast/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/sherisespodcast
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
What can I share with you that has been going on in my world? Well, for one, there are going to be some changes to my website. WomenTakingTheLead.com is going to get a whole new look and feel soon. I’m really excited about this because the changes are more reflective of my brand and what I am trying to accomplish with Women Taking the Lead.
If I haven’t shared already I’ve also begun reading A Course in Miracles. Or I should say I’m doing A Course in Miracles. It is a very interactive read, mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. As of the release of this episode on October 26, 2017 I am 36 days into the course. It has been both challenging and freeing.
While overall I can acknowledge I’m a pretty positive person, I have become aware of how critical I am of myself and others. While this awareness is a bit startling it’s a good thing because enables me to let go of being so critical.
Given some of the things I’ve been dealing with recently and what’s been going on in our society in the past few months I don’t think it was a coincidence that I took the opportunity finally to begin A Course in Miracles.
If you have done any part of the course or you are thinking about it I would love to hear from you. I don’t think this course is meant to be done on your own and I’m seeking a variety of perspectives. I’ve gained so much from others sharing with me what their experience has been, either the insights they’ve gained or questions they still have.
Lastly, what’s going on for me is in the next few weeks I am offering 30-Minute Calls to the members of the Women taking the Lead Private Facebook Group to chat about anything. It could be for coaching, for advice, to ask me anything and everything, etc. This call is for you, my only questions will be, “How can I be of service to you?” If you want in, head over to womentakingthelead.com/group to join the facebook group and schedule your call.
I’ve got a new series of 100% Jodi for you and it’s based on one of the most impactful books I have ever read, The Four Agreements. Last May I published a 100% Jodi episode titled, 9 Places I Found What I (Didn't Realize) I Needed. In that episode I shared 9 books that came into my life and changed it for the better.
Chronologically, The Four Agreements came into my life second but it is the book I recommend most when people ask what book I would recommend to others. The reason for this is I believe the biggest thing holding us back in our lives and our businesses is our stress reactions. Our stress reactions are created by our perception of self, others and the world at large.
Quite simply, the teachings in The Four Agreements enable you to change your perception so you don’t get stressed out by what’s happening. Because you don’t get stressed out and thus shut down, overreact or pretend things are okay when they are not, you can bring forth your highest self in any situation.
The Four Agreements are powerful because they are simple.
On Saturday, October 14, 2017 I had the pleasure of attending an event in Portland, Maine titled The Four Agreements for a Better Life. The speakers were don Miguel Ruiz, the author of The Four Agreements, and his sons don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. and don Jose Ruiz.
In this and the next few 100% Jodi episodes I’m going to share with you the notes I took that evening and some of my thoughts around the material.
Don Miguel Ruiz, Sr. started the evening declaring the most important agreement is “Be Impeccable with Your Word.” It is the most important agreement because your word creates your reality.
You have created the story of yourself so if you don’t like the story you have about yourself you can change it. You don’t have to be the current version of you anymore if you don’t want to.
You are an artist with your words. The art you create is the story of your life. It is not real, you made it up, so you can change it at any time.
Don Miguel Ruiz, Sr. issued a request to help him change the world. The way you change the world is by changing your own world. You change your world by changing the way you speak, specifically by no longer using words against yourself.
We make life difficult by adding drama to it.
You will change your world by changing the way you treat yourself and your physical body.
It doesn’t matter what others do. What is important is for you to enjoy your life.
What really struck me in what don Miguel Sr. shared is that it was a fantastic compliment to the conversation Libby Bunten and I had in last week’s On-Air Coaching Call episode. Libby and I recorded our call the day before this event occurred so I went into this event with our conversation fresh in my mind.
In that episode, Libby shared how her old story of who she is, specifically who she is for other people, was holding her back in her business and keeping her from being her highest self in her life. Not only was it keeping her from being her highest self but she could see how it was keeping those around her from being their highest selves as well.
Before our coaching call Libby had already started crafting a new story for herself, however, she was having difficulty living into it. We were able to identify some things that were holding her back from truly embracing her new empowering story and some practices that would help her to more quickly integrate it into her life.
My clients come to me for various reasons but what is always holding them back is a story they have about who they are, who other people are, how things should be done, etc.
These stories are the words that they repeat to themselves and keep them imprisoned in their current reality. Here are some examples:
“If you want something done right you’ve got to do it yourself.”
“I’m the only one who can do this.”
“I can’t trust others to do this the way it needs to be done.”
You cannot grow in your business or your career or your life without beginning to trust others. It may sound like an insurmountable hurdle but there are ways to build trust slowly so you can get to a place where you can allow other people opportunities to grow as well.
It can be done. It has been done. It could be yours.
“I’m not the expert.”
“I’ve only been in business for X amount of years.”
“My degree is in another field.”
“I don’t have the letters after my name.”
“Other people have so much more experience than I do.”
Let’s be clear, more experience, degrees and letters do not necessarily mean better results. In fact, when I challenged one of my clients on this belief she owned up that some of her clients had hired her after hiring a so-called “experienced expert” to come in and fix what the experienced person had done.
What society considers valuable is not necessarily what produces results. Please don’t devalue what you can do for your clients and customers. They need you to help them so be more confident so they can put their trust in you.
“If I speak up for myself I’ll hurt this person.”
“There’s no point in speaking up. They’re not going to listen to what I have to say.”
“There’s nothing I can do.”
“Why bother, it’s not going to make a difference.”
When we give our power away, when we stop speaking up for ourselves, for what we believe and we stop trying to make a difference we mentally become a victim to our circumstances. I’m not got to water this down. This mentality has catastrophic consequences to our health, work, relationships, finances, and thus destroys our experience of joy and peace.
There is NO FREEDOM in any of the stories I just mentioned and these stories attack who you really are, your highest self. They disrespect you and they disrespect others.
The moral of this episode is your words create your experience. Watch the words that flow through your mind and the words that come out of your mouth.
If you find the words that you think or speak upset you or limit what’s possible for you, you have a choice.
You can keep going on the way you’re going and hope things get better or you can challenge your words and choose new words that empower you.
“Be Impeccable with Your Word” is the most important agreement because your word creates your reality.
If you want to talk through any of this here is the reminder that in the next few weeks I am offering 30-Minute Calls to the members of the Women taking the Lead Private Facebook Group to chat about anything. It’s not limited to talking about this episode. It could be for coaching, for advice, to ask me anything and everything, etc. This call is for you, my only questions will be, “How can I be of service to you?” If you want in, head over to womentakingthelead.com/group to join the facebook group and schedule your call.
As always, I hope this was of value to you and here’s to your success!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
Sari de la Motte is the CEO and founder of FORTE. Sari has trained extensively with an internationally recognized authority in nonverbal communication and leads seminars based in nonverbal communication strategies throughout the United States. Sari has spoken for, and works with, several members of the Inner Circle of Advocates, an invitation-only group consisting of the top 100 trial attorneys in the United States. She’s been a featured columnist for Oregon Criminal Defense Lawyer’s Magazine, Oregon Defense Attorney, and for Washington State Association of Justice.
Click to tweet: .@SariDLM is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://womentakingthelead.com/238 #inspiration
Sari decided to expand recently. It was the wrong timing and it didn’t work out. Sari had a crisis of faith and questioned all of her decisions. What did she do wrong? Is this the end? In those moments it was easy for Sari to overlook her success and underplay her good moments.
Sari likes to take charge and do things now, apologizing later. This strategy has gotten her to places she has wanted to go, but she also had to learn the opposite side of it. Sari has learned that people tend to put themselves in boxes, when you should realize your range and give yourself permission to expand.
Sari has her first book deal! Her upcoming book, titled “From Hostages to Volunteers,” discusses jurors and the hostage situation they are brought into. Jurors are expected to use logic, reason and evidence to make decisions, yet they often don’t even want to be there.
When faced with a situation that doesn’t go as planned, women tend to withdraw and figure out problems alone. Sari was challenged with this recently when her expansion didn’t work out. Instead of turning inward, we should be reaching out and asking others for help.
Self care is very important to Sari. Each morning, she does Julia Cameron’s Morning Pages, three pages written to drain the brain. Your fears, plans—or even random thoughts—all get dumped onto these pages, leaving your brain clear and ready to focus on the day.
Sari would tell her younger self, and her current self, to be more patient.
“People won’t remember what you said, but they’ll remember what they felt.” ~Maya Angelou
Website: www.nonverbalforte.com
Website: www.attorneywhisperer.com
Free eBook: www.nonverbalforte.com/pumpupthevolume
Job Seeker Offer: www.nonverbalforte.com/showup
Twitter: @SariDLM
Facebook: www.facebook.com/nonverbalFORTE
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/saridlm
ThirdLove: Tired of compromising comfort, ThirdLove® set out to create a better bra. Armed with research and a lot of opinions, they scrapped the standard bra cup size molds—literally broke them!—and developed their own half-cup sizes based on real women’s measurements. Check out ThirdLove today!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
In the last On Air Coaching call there was more consulting going on. I chatted with Terri DeCoster about technology because that was the obstacle for her in her business.
In this call I’m chatting with Libby Bunten of Arbonne International and we had a coaching call which is more typical for me in my business. The issue we addressed was the conflict that arises when we are developing ourselves personally, professionally, mentally and spiritually and the people around us are not yet comfortable with the changes that are happening.
I want to underscore we’ve all been on both sides of this scenario whether we realize it or not. We’ve been the person trying to make positive changes in our lives and are experiencing resistance from the people around us and we’ve been the person resisting change in others.
No one thinks to themselves, “wow, good things are happening for my friend and I wish that weren’t the case.” It’s more a though like, “we used to think the same way about things and now you’re looking at things differently.” Or, you used to always be available for me and now you’re busy doing other things.”
This change in relationship dynamics is natural, it is happening all around us, and in the conversation you’re about to hear there is no judgment about how others should or should not be.
Libby and I covered topics like identifying and letting go of old stories, the space between letting go of an old story and taking on a new story; and once that new story is identified, integrating it so it becomes a natural part of our identity.
If you know you’ve been bumping up against some old stories that keep playing themselves out and are holding you back or if you’ve started to move toward a new empowering story but it’s creating some tension in your relationships, this is a great episode for you to listen to.
I really want to acknowledge Libby for getting so vulnerable. It was not easy for her but she knew it would be good for her and her business, and for those who would listen to this episode as well. And, Libby sent me a text an hour or so after we finished recording because she was experiencing an exposure hang over. I spoke about my own experience with an exposure hangover in a 100% Jodi episode regarding an episode I did on my spirituality.
What happened was Libby’s old story started playing itself out and she was worried about the potential negative impact this episode would have on others. When we talked it through and looked at this episode through the lens of her new story of her leadership and her success would ripple out and benefit all of those around her all the internal conflict and worry went away.
That’s how powerful our stories are and why we need to be aware of them and also have people in our lives who won’t let us play small, who won’t let us live by our old stories. I promised Libby I would call her on it if she showed up as her old story and she gave me a chance to keep my word within hours.
Libby and I hope this was of value to you and here’s to your success!
The Energy Leadership Assessment
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You can reach Jodi at jodi@womentakingthelead.com
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
Melissa Hereford has been teaching people how to negotiate for over 22 years. Through her workshops, Melissa teaches women skills to get ahead AND get along, to confidently ask for what you want without worrying that you’ll be called bossy or too aggressive.
A lot of women feel powerless like "they don't have a choice" in life situations. She’s here to show that you have all of the tools already inside you to make shifts in your everyday agreements that will change your life.
Click to tweet: .@mel_hereford is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://womentakingthelead.com/237 #inspiration
In her role as a Vice President, Melissa let her fears and insecurities stand in her way. She watched as this company lost customers and revenue and knew how to make changes, but was too afraid to speak up. If she had spoken up and given her team the reasons why and ideas to move forward, she could have really made an impact.
Earlier in her career, Melissa but a team from scratch and filled it with like-minded individuals. As her team grew, Melissa had to really look at each person and understand their motivations and strengths so she could help them act and work more effectively.
Melissa is so excited about being able to bring her negotiating skills to women, outside of a corporate setting. Most of the time, people don’t have access to these types of trainings unless their employer purchases them for the company. Through Negotiate with Confidence, Melissa is teaching women how to ask for things that they wouldn’t normally ask for — and they are actually getting them!
Melissa is Type-A and often finds herself striving for perfection. Her biggest challenge relating to her personality is her fear of failing. If details are missed, Melissa has a tendency to beat herself up and she is really trying to learn how to let that stuff go.
Something Melissa had to learn to do was trust her team. She makes sure to give them a change to do their job, without asking them — or letting them tell her — the nitty gritty details that she really doesn’t need to know.
“Take time off. Do not work every day. You need time to recharge.”
“The only thing to fear is fear itself.” ~FDR
“You can’t be that kid standing at the top of the slide, overthinking it. You have to go down the shoot.” ~Tina Fey
Website: https://MelissaHereford.com
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissa-hereford-170a063/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/mel_hereford
Negotiate With Confidence: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBb_nSImUPvzxDFVRq9Bt4g
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/negotiatewithconfidence/
Email: melissa@melissahereford.com
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
This episode is going to be short and sweet and you’re going to find out why pretty quickly.
One of my favorite shows of all time is The West Wing. I loved the quick pace, the witty banter, the thoughtful approach to complex issues, and the relationships of the characters. They were good people doing their best and occasionally, with good intentions, messing up.
There are many things I like about The West Wing but what I want to talk to you about today is something I noticed in the episodes and became very intrigued by.
Most of the meetings happened in short bursts. Some as short as 1-2 minutes and even in The Situation Room where serious things were going down, people got right to the point so they could fulfill the purpose of the meeting which was to make decisions. Information was given clearly and concisely and if more information was needed the meeting was ended and everyone moved on to do what they needed to do.
Otherwise, they made their decisions, everyone had their marching orders and they moved on. Meeting over. On to the next important issue.
I was reminded of this recently when I was meeting with a woman who was the head of an organization who was in a tight situation. She needed to have contact or facetime with many different groups but her days were getting eaten with meetings and she had to work longer hours to stay caught up on emails and get her own project work done.
I told her about what I’ve labelled “The 5-Minute Meeting” from The West Wing. She was intrigued and we explored what this could look like day-to-day for her.
Now this is not to say that all meetings are 5-minutes. That number is as arbitrary and meaningless as a 30, 60, or 90-minute meeting.
However, only allowing a meeting to as long as it needs to be prevents “needless expansion” from happening.
“Needless expansion” includes, among other things, people starting to come late to meetings because the meeting never start on time anyway. Idle chit chat at the beginning of the meeting that serves no purpose other than put off actually starting the meeting, and people coming to the meeting unprepared because they know there is plenty of time to talk ideas through rather than flesh them out beforehand.
Also, included in this is when people feel the need to tell stories, gossip, or give irrelevant opinions to the matter at hand. Then there’s the time when two people have a conversation in the meeting that they could have by themselves after the meeting but choose to have everyone bear witness to it instead. I’ve been victim to this rude behavior and I’ve been the perpetrator as well.
There are so many ways a meeting can be hijacked by time wasters and if you’re a people pleaser you probably struggle with how to handle it. Rude behavior isn’t always conscious behavior and that’s why we need other people to kindly bring our attention to it.
Not all meetings are time wasters but it’s important to do something about the ones that are.
For meetings I know to be time wasters, I’m a big fan of cutting the time for the meeting in half. To make it work you need to let everyone know the timeframe in advance and set some ground rules.
The ground rules may include that the meeting will start promptly at the start time, all materials to be discussed need to submitted to all attendees, for example, 24-48 hours in advance of the meeting and everyone needs to be prepared to concisely give their report. Let everyone know how much time they will have to present and hold them to it. Time them if you have to. They’ll learn.
And how do you end a meeting that is starting to go overtime? If it’s in person you stand up and let everyone know that’s all the time you have. Give assignments, thank everyone for their time, and move toward the door. If it’s via video conference you call the meeting to a halt, give assignments, thank everyone for their time and end the call.
Soon enough people will come to realize that your time is valuable and when you say the meeting will be 18 minutes (or however long you set for it) that means it’s up to them to make sure they are prepared going into the meeting and get right to the point.
Even if it’s not your meeting you can make requests to have them run a bit differently or say you can only be there for part of the meeting.
If you’re someone who hates meetings because they eat up too much of your day start doing what you can to minimize your exposure to this time-waster.
Though it might be uncomfortable to do at first, the reward is that you will become more relaxed, more productive, and more effective. Isn’t that worth it?
Before we say goodbye, if you have not yet joined the Women Taking the Lead private facebook group, come join. Hang out with me and other amazing go-getting women who know the power of community and networking. Go to womentakingthelead.com/group and click on the green +Join Group button.
As always, I hope this was of value to you and here’s to your success!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
Maegan Watson is a personal stylist and founder at Watson Style Group, a firm dedicated to creating wardrobes that practically hand you your outfit every time you get dressed so you feel the way you want and love the way you look. She has nearly a decade of experience supporting amazing women to feel great in their clothing so they’re empowered to stand out and speak up. She solves the unending question of “what should I wear today?” so your energy is reserved for family, fulfilling work, and fun! She lives in Chicago with her son, husband and chocolate lab.
Click to tweet: .@mydearwatson86 is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://womentakingthelead.com/236 #inspiration
Maegan offers complimentary styling sessions for new prospects. These 75-minute calls are super valuable and everyone really enjoys them. Wanting to increase the number of leads, Maegan started offering incentives for people to sign up for the calls. This actually had a negative affect on sales. People were signing up for the calls to receive the freebies, but not to work with Watson Styling Group. Maegan realized she was undervaluing herself, while also draining herself and the admin team.
Maegan’s leadership is constantly evolving. A key component to her leadership is giving credit to her team. When good things happen throughout the day, Maegan is mindful to take the time to send positive recognition to the team.
This past summer, Maegan and her team laughed a new membership subscription for her styling service. For a monthly fee, members are granted unlimited access to the talented team of stylists. Maegan is having a blast with this new project!
As fun as the new membership group is, it also brings a lot of challenges as well. The ease to sign women up just isn’t there with the new structure, but the members who are there are extremely happy.
Taking 100% of the responsibility, 100% of the time is very important to Maegan. It allows the other person to have some space, but it allows the other person to take 100% responsibility as well. It’s ok if you need a day or two, but as long as you get there genuinely, its a fantastic, freeing practice.
Maegan would tell her undergrad self to stop being fueled by success and realize that it isn’t healthy. Maegan’s mom tells her students that the joy should be in the process of learning, and not in receiving an A.
“We are not given dreams or ideas without the ability to create them. We are not given the vision of ourselves without the bravery to being this vision to life. All you have to do is tell yourself that you are worth it, over and over.”
Website: http://watsonstylegroup.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/watsonstylegroup/
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
We have covered 3 of the 4 phases in the Cycle of Change using the card game analogy as first taught to me by iPEC Coaching. These are: The Toss In Phase, The Shuffle Phase, and The Deal Phase. Now we’re going to cover The “Play the Game” Phase.
“Play the Game” is an exciting and mostly positive time during the Cycle of Change when you are all in to live your dreams and reach new levels of success, fulfillment and well-being.
Whereas in previous stages you were either reflecting on the past or imagining the future, this phase is the time to be fully in the moment.
You are living the strategy and the plan you created in The Deal Phase.
It is a time of action but the amount of action you will take in this phase is based on your personality, how clear you are on your goal, how feasible your plan is and how much support you have.
That’s why The Deal Phase is so crucial to set you up for success in this phase, though most plans will work if you can only get out of your own way.
What that means is in the Play the Game Phase it’s important to manage your inner critic, which always comes to life when you are doing something new, big or scary. This is where self-doubt can start to plague you and if you allow it too much power you will unconsciously begin to self-sabotage.
Know that it is natural and normal for your inner critic to try to have a field day with you. Change the perspective that hearing your inner critic is a bad thing. Rather, hearing your inner critic means you are playing full out and that’s a great thing.
If you are able to manage your inner critic you will, for the most part, feel harmonious, optimistic, determined and fully alive.
If you are able to remain flexible you will be able to pivot and adjust if things don’t go according to plan. Let’s face it, things rarely go exactly according to plan so it’s important not to get too attached to the plan or judge yourself and others too harshly for not expecting the unexpected.
When I first planned to self-publish my book last year I was only going to release an eBook in Kindle. A few weeks before the publish date I interviewed Honoree Corder and in our post-interview chat she convinced me of the benefit of releasing a print version as well.
What I didn’t realize was how different it would be to format a book for print versus a book for Kindle, and that last-minute realization ate up more than half a day.
I was also launching a membership community with the release of my book. While the formatting mini-crisis was going on I also discovered the membership software was not playing nice with payment software.
To add to the madness, unbeknownst to me my web developer became horribly ill that week and so didn’t get my messages for a couple of days. All I knew was that I needed her and she had gone radio silent.
I had also failed to communicate to my Graphic Designer the exact date I intended to submit everything to Amazon and so mock ups and final approvals for the cover all happened within days.
Then there were videos, copy and worksheets that needed to be created and uploaded to the membership portion of my website.
However, in all of this, I was 100% in, feeling fully alive, and rolling with everything whether it was going according to plan or not.
While this stage is usually associated with wins and success, it can also be the setting for disappointments, setbacks, and new challenges. You can probably look back on times in your life where the Play the Game Phase of the Cycle of Change did not go well.
If this is happening to you right now it’s important again not to judge yourself too harshly. Look on what is happening as a valuable lesson that you can examine and learn from so you go into the next Cycle of Change stronger and wiser.
Place your focus on what is working and what is not working without judgment and you’ll be able to make adjustments and pivot pretty easily because you won’t be heaping the past and emotion on the situation. Remain nimble and empowered by staying curious and looking for opportunities no matter what is happening.
People typically love this phase the most out of all of the four phases and wish it would continue on like this indefinitely, or better yet, for the rest of their lives.
Although that sounds great, chances are if you are still open to growth and being your best self you will be back in the Toss In Phase and the cycle will begin once again. It doesn’t mean you’ve backtracked, it actually means you are moving forward, even though it may not feel like it at first.
If you’d like to connect with me and other women who are exploring these conversations head over to womentakingthelead.com/group to join the Women Taking the Lead private Facebook group. This is a great group to ask questions, get support and have some fun with other ambitious go-getting women.
As always, I hope this was helpful to you and here’s to your success.
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
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Hira Ali is a Leadership Trainer, Speaker, Writer, ICF accredited Coach & Licensed NLP Practitioner. Over the past decade she has trained and coached hundreds of professionals belonging to various professions, cadres & ethnicities . Hira's articles have been have been featured in The ICF The Huffington Post, Thrive Global as well as Ellevate Network (a few of them have been shared by Arianna Huffington herself) She is regularly invited at various forums to talk on Leadership and Personal Development topics. Her self-development podcast 8 Minutes of Learning With Hira Ali has been featured in the Huff Post. Hira is the founder of ed Management Consulting, Advancing Your Potential & Revitalize and Rise.
Click to tweet: .@advancingyou is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://womentakingthelead.com/235 #inspiration
While in school, Hira was terrified to speak in front of her peers, to the point of refusing to turn up to a speech she could be chosen at. Later, this caused her to cry as she was a good student with a lot to say. She now tries to push herself forward in those situations, but it still happens from time to time. Hira has to ask herself, “What is the worst that can happen?”
Hira’s leadership is always evolving. When she was managing a team in person, Hira took on more of a team leader role. Now that she is in the online world, her leadership has changed from people-oriented, to task-oriented. Hira is working on mixing the two.
Hira is working on her book and new online training program right now.
Hira finds working remotely with teams can be challenging, especially when they are abroad. Hira tries to work one-on-one with her team and coordinate times that works for everyone.
Hira creates a good, but realistic, vision for her team in order to keep them motivated and driven.
Even up to a year ago, Hira would tell herself to be more focused and prioritize.
“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.” ~Henry Ford
Website: www.advancingyourpotential.com
Website: www.revitalizeandrise.com
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hira-ali-5972b91b
Twitter: https://twitter.com/advancingyou
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/advancingyour/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/advancingyourpotential/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/edmanagementconsulting/
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
In the last episode I continued our exploration of the Cycle of Change using the analogy of a card game which was first introduced to me by iPEC Coaching. If you have not listened to the first two episodes covering the Cycle of Change I recommend you go back to the episodes titled Respecting Where You Are on Your Journey and The Secret to Clarity is Reflection and Research, respectively. These are quick episodes and will catch up on The Cycle of Change.
I mentioned in The Secret to Clarity is Reflection and Research how I had moved into the Shuffle Phase and so I required more time to reflect and begin researching different options for the direction of Women Taking the Lead.
Another thing that I was fully aware of but it started to become a problem in this Shuffle Phase is the constant feeling I have of being busy. I feel, and I want to stress the word feel, I feel like I’m always overbooked and up against several deadlines. This causes me to constantly abuse the busy word and it impacts my mindset and how I “BE” in my life.
What had been happening was I was not honoring my flow; I time-block to get project work done, and have separate time blocks for meetings and consults. But I find I am constantly giving away my project time blocks because, let’s face it, I consider other people’s time to be more important than my own.
And here’s my dirty little secret. I am constantly working on the weekends because my projects get pushed from the work week to the weekend. Don’t get me wrong, I love the work I do, and would probably choose to do a little bit for my business every day but that’s not what’s happening. I wake up on Saturday and Sunday knowing I have to do several hours of work each day to play catch up before the work week begins all over again on Monday.
I’m done with that. So on Saturday when I thought through what was happening and what I really wanted in this Cycle of Change for Women Taking the Lead I realized I don’t want to be doing project work every weekend. So I moved all my tasks to the coming week so I could not give my time away.
Wish me luck and send me your love and energetic support as I commit to taking better care of myself, while leaving other people feeling honored and supported.
Now, onto The Deal Phase.
In the Cycle of Change using the card game analogy, The “Deal” Phase comes after The Shuffle Phase and before Playing the Game. The Deal Phase is marked by an increase in activity – this will include networking, testing out interests or experimenting, training and skill building. Thus, the plan that was developed in the Shuffle phase is beginning put into action.
You will have more energy and a more positive attitude because you now you can actually do something; you are following a path, you have a direction to go in. You’re open to new experiences, new people, and preparing yourself for the intensity of the next phase.
When you are in this phase you are more optimistic, seeing life as an opportunity, and so you experience more confidence in this stage than in any other. You are the proverbial adventurous student of life eager to stretch, learn, and grow in new directions.
When you first enter this this stage you will shy away from making commitments. Remember, this is the phase of experimenting and because of this you’ll tend to want to keep your options open and take things “one step at a time.”
Before entering the next phase you’ll make a firm commitment to trust yourself and the choice you have made. In the next phase you will be assessing and evaluating the plan but what’s important in The Deal Phase is your ability to move to the point where you can make a choice to move forward and make something happen.
Here you’ll also be looking around for allies, mentors and guides who can help to see you through the next phase successfully.
You’re now developing a new plan that will take you beyond networking and experimenting. You will identify one or more goals for the next phase and the work at the end of The Deal Phase is to have a strategy and a plan formed. Anticipation, excitement and energy will increase as you gain more clarity around all of these pieces.
There is also fear of failure or success, likely a combination of both, but you will be poised for action.
Having a vision of what success will look like in the next phase. This will not only get you excited for what’s to come but may also help to identify any gaps in resources or training that you will need to set you up for success.
In the last phase you were identifying your core values and how you wanted to live your life. Here it’s also important to know what brings you alive, what value you want to bring and at least a sense of what your purpose or mission is. If you can connect your goals to these things it will fuel your fire.
Don’t overthink purpose, mission, and the value you want to bring. This can be something you experiment with in this phase. For instance, in my case I can boil down my purpose to the statement, “my purpose is to wake people up to how awesome they already are so they can get on with their purpose.” That is clearly tied to the goals I have for Women Taking the Lead and yes, it fuels my fire. It motivates me on the days when I can’t see progress or I just don’t feel like it.
Start with the change you’d like to see in the world and let it unfold from there.
If you are externally motivated, have an accountability partner or group. This will keep you from backtracking. It’s not to say you cannot pivot based on what you are learning from your networking and experimenting. Forward movement coming from informed decisions is what you are looking for here. The accountability is about ensuring, for you, that this is what’s happening.
As always, having trusted advisers who have your highest good at heart and who can listen intently, cheer you on, and help you clarify your next steps is priceless. If you have some like this who is also great at setting priorities and making a plan, especially if this is not your forte, bonus!
If you are in this phase and you have not yet read my book Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing I’m going to strongly encourage you do so. A lot of what you need to do to navigate The Deal Phase successfully is in this book. From creating a vision to success, to getting at your core values, your purpose and mission, Superpowers, and even creating goals and designing a plan are in this book. It’s a tool you do not want missing from your toolkit.
If you have read Accomplished and you are finding yourself in The Deal Phase, read it again. This book is a process that will take you to new levels of knowing yourself and finding success with each reading.
Okay, that’s The Deal Phase. We only have one more phase to cover, Playing the Game phase, and I’ll be doing that in the next 100% Jodi episode.
As always, I hope this was of value to you and here’s to your success!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women listening to the podcast!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!
Katie Allen is Vice President of viaONEHOPE, empowering entrepreneurs to make an impact while making an income. Katie leads the business and the community of over 2000 Cause Entrepreneurs. After experiencing firsthand the challenges of raising a family and working full-time, Katie transitioned to a career fulfilling the need for balance, freedom and flexibility. She is passionate about helping other entrepreneurs find and fulfill their purpose. Katie graduated from the University of Nebraska. She and her husband John are proud parents two daughters.
Click to tweet: .@viaONEHOPE is sharing her story to inspire you on Women Taking the Lead https://womentakingthelead.com/234 #inspiration
When Katie’s children were little, she had a busy lifestyle. Working, maintaining her home, being a parent, and trying to keep up a healthy marriage all had her feeling stuck. Katie was used to taking big risks, but now with a family, there was a lot more to consider. Katie started to lose her spark, until she started working part time for fun.
When Katie first moved to California, she worked for a big movie studio. Katie’s job appeared glamorous to her family back home in Omaha, but in reality, she was miserable. Katie doubted her ability to find a better job, until she simply could not take it anymore. Standing up for herself at that job and leaving was a very proud moment for her.
Katie is all about empowering others so they can achieve their fullest potential. She tends to remain hands off, but will always give a gentle nudge when needed.
OneHope Wine has a new winery under construction in Napa Valley. Katie is hoping that sometime in 2018 they will start welcoming people to the winery.
Though there is exciting new growth within the company, it can be a little overwhelming at times. Katie is trying to stay ahead of the game by planning out months in advance, while also keeping the same tight-knit family feel amongst the company.
Katie remains fearless and willing to take risks. “If your team sees you do that, they will follow suit.”
Katie would advise her younger self to drink more water and moisturize.
“The two most important days of your life are the day that you’re born and the day you figure out why.” ~Mark Twain
Website: viaONEHOPE.com
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/katie-allen-832b181a/
Twitter: @viaONEHOPE
Facebook: @viaONEHOPEcommunity
Instagram: @onehope
First, the Agents of Change conference was awesome! I want to give a huge thank you to Rich Brooks, Amanda O’Brien, Lindsay Babayan and the whole Flyte New Media team who made this such an awesome experience. A crap-load of work goes into an event like that and they made it look easy.
Then, I got to hang out with a lot of you. The Women Taking the Lead community was in attendance at The Agents of Change. What was really fun was The Agents of Change conference happened the day after last Thursday’s 100% Jodi episode in which I introduced The Cycle of Change. Several of you came up to me to let me know you listened to the episode and it rung true for you as well. We had a lot of fun laughing about how much we resist the Toss In phase but we are looking forward to the next phase.
And for my new friends…if we met at The Agents of Change and you’ve just started to listen to Women Taking the Lead, Welcome!! If you have not yet joined the private facebook group for this podcast you can find it at facebook.com/groups/womentl/.
Last week, I introduced The Cycle of Change using the analogy of a card game as I learned it through iPEC Coaching. I gave an overview of the four phases you can find yourself, in any area of your life. I’m going to dive into each phase and I started with the phase that I was in with Women Taking the Lead, the Toss In phase.
We don’t go through The Cycle of Change once; we go through it over and over again with each cycle ending in the Toss in. The Toss In is a stage of completion and probably some bittersweet feelings as you start to accept everything that happened in the last phase and move toward emotionally detaching from it and in some cases there may be a physical separation from the environment and people who were in the last cycle with you.
So, using the card game analogy, this is when the last game comes to an end but you’re still alive and so you will continue to play one game or another. Again, it’s a continuous cycle.
Phase 1: Shuffle (Thinking and Reflecting)
The next phase, the “Shuffle” phase is a non-committal phase where you want to contemplate what was and what could be next. In the Toss In phase of non-action, the contemplating and reflecting had more to do with grieving and letting go of the past and what could have been.
In The Shuffle phase the contemplation and reflection moves toward focusing mostly on possibilities for the future.
I know myself and a lot of you will feel uncomfortable allowing for inactivity for an indefinite amount of time. But believe me, if you give yourself the space to do this you will then naturally begin to move into the part of The Shuffle phase where you begin research and network, and you will find the next thing that will re-energize and re-engage you.
When you enter The Shuffle phase you will find that you are better able to deal with the pain you began experiencing in the Toss In phase. You will also find you are better able to think on those events from the last cycle without becoming emotional. Rather, you can reframe what happened and logically process the information to find what worked and what didn’t work, giving you more expertise moving into this new cycle.
This is also the phase where you will evaluate where you are in your life. You’ll examine your core values and feelings so you can decide what is really important to you in your life and that will help you decide where you want to move next and how you want to play that game.
If you are in the beginning of this phase you’ll likely feel that you have lost control in this area of your life and that may spill over into other areas because you will second guess yourself. However, you’re also likely feeling like there’s an opportunity here for you – you just don’t know what it is yet.
This is also a phase in which you will likely experience spiritual growth because of the need to go inward and connect with something greater causing a leap in personal growth.
At the end of this phase you will have more inner strength, a plan to grow, and renewed energy. You will have a new vision for the future which will give you hope and a new purpose.
With all of this you will have more enthusiasm going into each day and will probably be breathing a sigh of relief that you can now move on and DO something.
If you allowed yourself to do the kind of work required in this phase (reflecting and researching) you will be able to focus on the right activities that will move you forward, rather than engaging in activities that are just what you think you “should” be doing.
If you find you are enthusiastic about researching, exploring new ideas, and networking and connecting with people who can move you forward in this area, you are likely well into this phase.
I mentioned in the last episode that I was definitely in the Toss In phase.
I don’t know if it’s because I had a chance to talk about on the podcast and with some of you at The Agents of Change conference, or if it’s because I’ve finally started catching up on the sleep I’ve been deprived of all summer – you guys, I slept a full 8 hours after Agents of Change and then took a nap the next afternoon. A nap - I can’t remember the last time I took a nap. I’m not known for napping.
I don’t know if it was from all of that but I can definitely feel myself in The Shuffle phase.
As I mentioned before I had already made some changes to the podcast and they felt right but I can feel myself wanting to do a deep dive again to make sure the vision I’ve had for Women Taking the Lead still excites me or if I need to dream bigger or change some of my plans.
I’ve started working with a digital strategist who just as a part of the discovery session has gotten me to think about who I am, what my gifts are, who I’m meant to serve and how I can best serve her.
I’ve also started drawing to me people who are energy workers, intuitive coaches and even mediums – here’s where the spiritual and personal growth play in.
I’ve let go of the discontent that after so much massive action in the last year things are still not exactly how I wanted them to be and I’ve moved on to dreaming about something new.
It feels good to be here and I’ll be keeping you posted on my progress.
For those of you who found your ears perking up and may nodding along as I went over The Shuffle phase here are some things that may help you now.
First, trust that everything you need to move through this phase will come to you. You don’t have to control or force it, just let it unfold and follow what interests you. Your curiosity and your interests are your north start right now.
Second, you’re starting to reach out to others. Only give your time and energy to those who want your highest good and avoid those who seem to be pushing or pulling you in a direction that doesn’t feel good or make sense to you right now. If you can sense judgment coming from them, just put some space between you and them for a while.
Third, when you’re ready to take a little bit of action, don’t overthink it. Just start somewhere. You can always pivot if your first moves aren’t giving you the information that you need.
Fourth, there may be some anxiety and you will likely find yourself coming face-to-face with beliefs or automatic ways of being from the past that make you anxious and hold you back. Confront them and challenge the truth of it.
For instance, for me an old belief that I get confronted with on occasion is the belief that if I have needs then I am burdensome and a bother to people. In this phase, that would hold me back from reaching out to others to ask them to impart their wisdom to me. Even though the reality is those with wisdom crave the opportunity to pass on what they know to those who are ready to receive it.
When I am confronted with thoughts like, “they have so much going on, I don’t want to disturb them”, or, “well that was a curt reply to my text, they must be annoyed with me”, I have to consciously let that go and trust that if I they really don’t have time for me they will kindly let me know.
Lastly, when you’re ready, begin creating goals and a plan to accomplish those goals. Then decide how and when you want to begin. Tap on those people who have your highest good at heart. They want to help in this stage because you are acting in alignment with your own highest good.
If you have not yet joined the private facebook group for this podcast you can find it at facebook.com/groups/womentl/.
I hope this was of value to you and here’s to your success!
Zebralove Web Solutions: Your website tells a story about your business! At Zebralove Web Solutions, Milly and her team are going to make sure your website tells the story you want your customers to hear. Connect with Milly at zebralovewebsolutions.com to create the impression you want to make!
Private Facebook Community: Chat, share and collaborate with other women in the community!
Accomplished: How to Go from Dreaming to Doing: A simple, step by step system that gives you the foundation and structure to take your goals and make them happen.
The Accomplished Community: A community of entrepreneurial Type A women uniting to achieve their biggest goals with confidence, integrity and a sense of humor.
If you enjoyed this episode subscribe in iTunes, Stitcher Radio, Google Play Music or iHeart Radio and never miss out on inspiration and community!